I have always felt as if I grew up in the wrong decade. “Leave It to Beaver” is my idealistic time period. With that being said, the first thing that pops in my head when I hear “The American Dream” is a well-kept house in a quiet neighborhood. The yard is adorned with shrubs and brightly colored flowers. The grass is evenly cut with diagonal lines stretching from the sidewalk to the flowerbeds. Vertical, slatted shutters hang next to each window. These white shutters contrast with the muted teal paint on the wood siding. The mailbox is neatly painted with the family’s last name.
The family consists of a mother, father, son and daughter, all living under one roof. The father is a businessman who wears suits and carries a briefcase. His hair is cut short, and his face is free of any facial hair. The mother’s job is to take care of the house and children. She volunteers at the school and is well respected in the community for her charitable work. She is always seen with a smile on her face and pearls around her neck. Of course, the children are well behaved and are good students who are heavily involved in sports, arts, and organizations. Perhaps most importantly, they dress and act appropriately in social situations.
This family is middle to upper-middle class. They have two moderately new vehicles, nice furniture, and plenty of food on the table. Speaking of food, they eat dinner together every night. During this time, the family discusses the events of the day and entertains each other’s thoughts.
While this may all be a little far-fetched, it is the epitome of the American Dream to me. Do I live this way? No. Did I grow up this way? No. Is this really how I want to live? No, but it is what is embedded in my mind to be what everyone strives to have. We want a safe place to grow up, a family for support, and nice things.
When I asked a co-worker what her idea of the American Dream was, I chuckled when she described the neatly kept house and perfect little family. She immediately asked why I was laughing, as if she had said something inappropriate. I simply explained that we had the same idea, despite the difference in our age and upbringing. Perhaps we represent only a few who believe this, but that concept is also a part of the dream. Everyone is entitled to his or her own American Dream.
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2 comments:
Pam,
The mental picture in my head is very similar to yours. However, my reality was a lot like your picture. I lived in a well-kept house. My mom didn’t work outside the house, although she was always very busy. Our yard was always very neat and we had a huge garden out behind the house. My dad went to work every day, not in a suit because he was a farmer. All seven of lived together under the same roof and we had family dinners whenever possible. My mom often fed her children and then waited until my dad got home late from harvesting to eat with him. And, in my opinion, we knew how to dress and behave in public because if we didn’t we heard about it.
I can’t help but wonder if this vision of the American Dream is because of where I grew up, North Dakota, the images portrayed in the media, such as Normal Rockwell paintings, or shows like “Leave It To Beaver”. I still try to maintain this reality for my family but life seems so much faster in California. So many families need to be two income families just to afford their mortgage, rent and other expenses. It is harder to have family dinners and spend time discussing our days.
I think there are a lot of people whose visions would be similar to yours but their realities are what keep them striving for that vision.
I learned to be a father by watching "Leave It to Beaver." Ward Cleaver seemed to find patience even when the Beave made goofball mistakes. His loving-kindness while working hard to provide for his family does seem right to me. His values about family became my own.
Bill
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